"The Preacher, the Politicain, the Teacher, Were each of them once a kiddie. A child, indeed, is a wonderful creature. Do I want one? God Forbiddie!"

"A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold."

"When there are monsters there are miracles."

"People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they don't want it."

"Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else."

"Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for."

"'Coolidge is dead' 'How could they tell?"

"No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: He is always convinced that it says what he means."

"It is when I struggle to be brief that I become obscure."

"Be polite to all, but intimate with few."

"Where love and wisdom drink out of the same cup, in this everyday world, it is the exception."

"A successful lie is doubly a lie; an error which has to be corrected is a heavier burden than the truth."