"I'm out of ammunition on this."

"Memory is the greatest of artists, and effaces from your mind what is unnecessary."

"When I was young, I used to think that wealth and power would bring me happiness... I was right."

"Life is not so bad if you have plenty of luck, a good physique and not too much imagination."

"Idleness is an inlet to disorder, and makes way for licentiousness. People who have nothing to do are quickly tired of their own company."

"He must not laugh at his own wheeze. A snuff box has no right to sneeze."

"The only difference between a rut and a grave... is in their dimensions."

"There are few sorrows in which a good income is of no avail."

"My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there."

"God is really only another artist, he made the elephant, giraffe and cat. He has no real style but keeps trying new ideas."

"Aren鈥檛 used to rat-free outfield"

"Life does not cease to be funny when people die; any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."